Okay, I *like* the revolver, but there's something just wrong about a gun with a notepad. This is just, umm, calling out to be Photoshopped. Also, the Walther-looking one is just creepy.

“While you're making everybody happy - do a good job and include yourself!”

Ow ow ow.
When you feel sad, or under a curse
Your life is bad, your prospects are worse
Your wife is crying, sighing...
And your olive tree is dying,
Temples are graying, and teeth are decaying
And creditors weighing your purse...
Your mood and your robe
Are both a deep blue
You'd bet that Job
Had nothin' on you...
Don't forget that when you go to
Heaven you'll be blessed..
Yes, it's all for the best...

Is it wrong that I immediately thought of suicide as the Christmas Gift? Yikes.