1970s comic book ads: Guns, counterfeiting machines, and Cayman Island accounts...for kids!

These ads are taken from a post I made called "The Scooby Doo Drinking Game" (basically, you take a drink whenever you see something that would NEVER fly in a Scooby comic today). I took out the advertisement sections and posted them here because I thought you'd get a kick out of them. If you want to see scans of the whole comics (and/or play the drinking game), check them out here.



Charlton Issue 1 ads






OMG WTF!?!? O_o



It’s been years since I’ve seen one of these ads trying to make children think they can get rich selling worthless crap from some novelty company (does anyone besides the Girl Scouts still do this?). Not a drink-worthy ad. Just kinda funny





Classified ads! Who knew that Scooby comics were a great place for them?

--I love the “Buy gold and silver to beat inflation NOW!!!” ad. Glenn Beck must have been working for Charlton back in the 70s. XD
--That Cayman Island Bank account ad just floored me. Did kids in the 70s NEED information on how to hide their money from Uncle Sam!?
--And did the kids need dating services, too?
--And I call bullshit on the “sell your song lyrics to famous singers and collect royalties” ad.






There's nothing offensive or drink-worthy about this ad. I just don’t understand how people buying Scooby comics are the ideal demographic for expensive jewelry



This DON’T BE A SKINNY LOSER ad is hilarious. Right now, society would love it if being too skinny was the average little boy's biggest problem!









Playboy decals! For kids!!





This one warrants two drinks. One for the “sex maniac” tag. And one for the frat-tastic “USA drinking team” tag.





This ad is just….there's so much weirdness in it....



I’m so naïve that it actually took me a while to figure out what these master/slave t-shirts meant. And now I’m just horrified that these things are sitting just a page away from Scooby and the gang.




I’m not sure the positioning of the pitchfork was intentional or just a funny goof on the artist’s part



Charlton Issue 2 ads

More “please sell our cheap crap” ads (did any kids actually make money doing this!?)









The stuff this one is selling is hilarious! I don’t think even an adult could easily get a hold of them today…





Yeah. I bet the biggest problem young Scooby fans had back in the day was other kids on the playground bumming their smokes.



I’m sure this thing didn’t work but still…selling something that says “break the law with our awesome product” is pretty WTF.




Advertising a toy gun by gushing about how real it looks and sounds? Good luck doing that today!




Turning a healthy, harmless vegetable into a weapon!? Something this awesome would NEVER be marketed to kids today.







These ads are amusing, but none of them are really drink worthy (except maybe the “hot German pen pals” one)



Charlton issue 3 ads
















Wow. Prayer requests and about a dozen “change your awful body TODAY” ads in a Scooby Doo book. Didn't expect that.







I just want to say that the “love spreads germs, GET ME SICK” tag is one of the most unsexy phrases I’ve ever heard. Seriously, yuck! >_<  



Love these. I found some pretty great ones in some issues of the Marvel Comics Star Wars from 1978 and 1979. The Social Security plates didn't get a near full page presence but were mentioned a few times. Thanks for posting them! I think I'll finally scan mine too.
It would be really funny if some of these were printed out and sent off...
Playboy decals! For kids!!


Actually, I've seen both Playboy stationary (marketed at the 8-12 market) and Playboy kid's underwear in the last couple of years. The latter is really messed up.
I've seen Playboy bunny gear in the "Young Adult" section (in addition to t-shirts with wildly inappropriate slogans on them). It always makes me sad and angry.
Toy Solders
(Anonymous)
I miss mine... I loved these-- if I went back to my old house I bet I would find some in the back yard...