"Hello, Debbie. ...Oh, it's Elfstar now? Oh, okay. Here is a copy of the game Dungeons and Dragons; join a group and play it for a while and then come back when one of your friends kills herself over it."
My Grandmother taught me to be a witch but she never looked like that.... :)
Well, y'know, it's the infamous quotation marks...no doubt to throw the postmaster off when you send in the coupons...
Great White Brotherhood? Yeah, we've got that here in North Carolina too.