You want me to put radium WHERE?

More from the company's brochure:

Weak Discouraged Men!
Now Bubble Over with Joyous Vitality Through the Use of Glands and Radium

". . . properly functioning glands make themselves known in a quick, brisk step, mental alertness and the ability to live and love in the fullest sense of the word . . . A man must be in a bad way indeed to sit back and be satisfied without the pleasures that are his birthright! . . . Try them and see what good results you get!"

More radium-related quackery here.
Oh, radioactivity! Was there anything you couldn't do?

(Don't mind the ass cancer! The great sex will be worth it!)
ack! that's almost as good as putting lysol in your vagina! oh, what lengths won't people go to...
Mmmmmmm, cocoa butter base! Mmmmmmmm, sexually weak men.

Also splendid for piles and rectal sores!!!

Lovely Saturday night contribution.
doesn't radiation make things big? Or give you superpowers?
Sadly, no... in real life, if it' strong enough/persistent enough to have an effect, the only super powers it gives you are cancer and death.
I am CANCER-MAN! Able to blah blah blah... I was being ironic, anyway - and quoting the Simpsons :)
I wonder what magazine this came from and what year. wow.