Thick white siz.

Why can't you just light some old newspapers on fire and then stick the coals on that, anyway?
Don't confuse your Fuel Whip with your Cool Whip!
Newspapers? Bah! What are you, a sensible, mature person? The possibilities for mayhem with this are endless, provided you don't sign your work with letters of flame. Besides, newspapers tend to get floaty and drop hot ashes throughout the neighbourhood.
I wish this company was still around, though. Because while Siz was...ill-conceived...Glass Wax was The Best Thing Ever for cleaning glass. I still have a can, and will be a sad panda when it is all used up.
I just got a catalog from that place in the snail mail last week. It's fun seeing all sorts of vintage-y stuff still being sold.
OMG, I have been trying to think of that company's name for ages! Thank you for the reminder.

Stasia
Oh, I love VCS. It sells all kinds of neat stuff. I wish I could afford a lot of their stuff; I'd clean them out haha.
Gee, I can't think of any reason that there could be any trouble or injuries resulting from what's virtually a can-o-napalm.

I'll be the first to admit that I'd probably be the first one to find fun non-charcoal uses for the stuff.
1120F? Ok, there's no reason for anything to be that hot at a barbecue. There's just not.
Yes
I'll bet this was pulled from the market because people had waaaaay too much fun with it. I know I would!

Looks like it makes a good pie topping, too! Flammable Redi-Wip!!!
Yes
This ad has 'dumb things my (generic) ex-husband did' written all over it.
Every other joke has been made, but what else stuck out for me was how the phrase "holds each coal in a clutch of fire" sounds kind of romance novel-y.

He held her in his warm embrace, as though she were a simple coal in the clutch of a majestic fire. There were no false starts, he clung to her every briquet with his perfect finger-tip control. "Give me your hot, white SIZ," she purred into his ear. She was soaking, but this time... it was necessary.

They burned together, longer too.
Thanks!

It's the goddamn Game of Thrones books I can't stop reading. I used to be educated, reading Kissinger autobiographies and whatnot. Now I just think about zombies coming from the frosty north.

What would Kissinger do with zombies n' ish coming from the frosty north, I wonder?
yes
You know, if they re-introduced this stuff today, it would dominate YouTube within a week.